I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize