Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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