Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize