Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
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