New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are a booty call, not a friend.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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