Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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