is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize