dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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