Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize