id be glad to
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I stole a fireplace last night.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize