hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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