I'm eating all of the evidence.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize