We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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