I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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