yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize