GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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