Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
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