speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
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