Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Your cock deserves a montage
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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