Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
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I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
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me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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