i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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