They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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