Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize