Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
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