I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
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As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
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I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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