so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize