there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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