it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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