I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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