Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
You work out of a Hotel?
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize