whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
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