i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize