**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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