I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Ketchup is God's man juice
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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