I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize