Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize