i jhust puked up my retainher.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize