your room smells of hookers.
And success
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
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I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
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It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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