I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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