your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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