He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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