Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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