16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
He had one of those small greek statue penises
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Randomize