tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Randomize