I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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