Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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