We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize