All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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