he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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