Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize